Sitting inside the aeroplane waiting for it to take off, here I am, thinking back to how, as always, there is that feeling of not having had enough time at home, in Madras. Four hours away from now, the home in Singapore beckons. There will be chores to be done and unpacking and sorting/arranging of all the loads of luggages that I am now carrying with me. The next couple of days are going to be crazy days.
I have always loved travelling by train during day time since I can happily vEDikkai pAtthufy. From Madras to Mayavaram as the landscape changes from concrete jungle and dirty, smelly rivers like Cooum and Adyar to hillocks, hills, lakes including the huge Chengalpet lake and almost-dry rivers like Paalar to lush green fields and canals with the fields and water bodies inhabitated by cranes, storks and the like and cows and goats happily grazing in the open pastures, it has always been a nice, beautiful journey. The familiarity of the scenes and landscapes feel comforting to me.
Every time I take a train having overhead stretch in Singapore, it is this Madras to Mayavaram route that I remember. The views from MRT in Singapore predominantly comprise only of HDB apartments, private Condominiums and malls barring a few companies/offices. Cut back to the train journey in our vast country – isn’t it filled with nature’s beauty?
I also remember the train journeys in Europe – in the Belgium, Paris, Luxembourg regions. The countryside or so I think it was, were all very, very beautiful with nice independent houses having backyards with horses, gardens and slides and swings for the kids of the house. The cool weather further added to the beauty.
There was a time when I, as a child, wanted to travel by day train, Chozhan Express to Mayiladuthurai/Mayavaram and my mother used to say what a hassle it was to travel with kids during daytime along with, not to forget, packing food for the entire day.
Today, as I am now travelling by Chozhan Express, that too on a side lower berth simply because my daughter wanted to, I think back to how the very thought of day time travel felt tiring to me initially. Life comes a full circle indeed.
I think this word was given the additional meaning of someone visiting a doctor since an immense amount of it is required from them while waiting for their turn to see the doctor.
Sitting at the ophthalmologist waiting for my turn, I tell myself that I just should not launch off on that endless rant about how the last few trips to Madras became ones filled with way too many doctor appointments. Yes, I am grateful for the fact that these were all only for routine check-ups, speech therapy sessions and some dental procedures including surgical tooth removals. But I hate the fact that I have to wait for that trip to India to get everything from a routine eye check-up to a dental filling done. I see a lot of NRIs have all these eye doctor and dentist appointments as part of their India trip itinerary. No, I am not launching off on another rant about my preference for India or Madras. But all I crave for right now is for at least the next trip being one just for spending full-time with my parents and sister with no doctor visits or interruptions whatsoever. Maybe next year, just for that I should book a ticket at a short notice and come and enjoy for at least a week.
Come to think of it, I have always hated travelling by share autos. Right from my college days when the share autos started becoming popular, it was never my preferred mode of transport since it meant sitting squeezed next to strangers. Later on, with the introduction of those white Tata Magic share autos, there was a lot more space, the vehicles themselves were in a much better condition and the rides were much more better. The few times I travelled so far were only during off-peak hours.
The last week saw me taking these share autos from Vani Mahal to T. Nagar bus stand at 6 in the evening. With autos coming every two minutes and charging only Rs. 10 for the travel, this is a great commuting option for shopping in T. Nagar without parking woes.
However, the problem arises only when 10th person wants to board the share auto. This is when everyone in the middle compartment which can accommodate only 6 persons has to move and get crushed and give space to that person. The situation further worsened during yesterday’s ride when eleventh person wanted to board the auto too!!!
I was the lone soul asking the tenth and eleventh persons why they wanted to board the share auto when it was already full and why they couldn’t wait for another two-three minutes more to board the next auto. Neither the passengers nor the driver opened their mouth leaving me wondering whom I was talking to.
I, for one, am done with travelling by share autos during peak hours.
Right from the very first time I travelled to India from Singapore, a whole range of thoughts, emotions, ponderings and what-nots take over me just a few days before I leave, with it all reaching the max on the day of leaving. Among all the thoughts, apart from the cliched ‘How did so many months pass by so soon?’ or ‘Did I do at least one note-worthy thing in all these days?’, one dominant feeling that takes over me is guilt at not keeping the house in a state that I like.
Am neither a perfectionist at all instances nor am I at my brisk max at all times. I often hear others around me justifying the level of disorganization my house is in, attributing it to me being totally tied up with my children all day everyday. Yes the days are crazy yet filled with several fun-filled and cherishable, cute moments. But I definitely wouldn’t say that I can use that as an excuse, at least not anymore.
When I am about to pack up a few dresses, it strikes me how better they will all look if only I had ironed them. When I sit to search for something inside a cupboard, all those well-organized Ikea catalog photos and all those Apartment Therapy and Houzz houses come to mind. Forget about all those online world, my own home in Madras has always been very clean and very well-organized.
A look around the kitchen reminds me of how I am still not able to organize it all in a much better way all thanks to frequent visits by cockroaches. As I see the toys strewn around, I tell myself that I should find out how to teach my children how to keep it all organized.
And in the midst of all this guilt comes the sudden burst of energy that always comes when a deadline is fast approaching and I set out to organize all the cupboards, leaving them behind in a much better state than it was. That was what I had been doing today. Thus, I feel good and contented, despite realizing that minimalism will never be something that I can embrace. We have way too many things and toys at home.
At 11 in the night, that too after a long, tiring day and the alarm already set for the ungodly hour of 4 in the morning, I know that I should already be fast asleep. But, when the reason you have to wake up early is to catch a morning flight to Madras, how will the excitement evenet you sleep?!
School holidays. A break from routine. December season. Family. Friends. Relatives. Children fully lost in the company and world of their own friends. Yummy, tasty food made by my mother. Driving my car – did I tell you I am tired of running to the bus stop to catch the public transport bus to school every morning?. The impending Margazhi kuLuru. Shopping at Cotton Street, Max, Pantaloons, Westside, Lifestyle and the one and only Saravana Stores. Kapaleswarar kovil visit. The very joy of being in Madras!
Oh the visits to pediatrician, ophthalmologist, dentist – Forget about the cost, do you know how difficult it is to see a specialist in Singapore? – I really hate how the Madras trips have become synonymous with all the routine doctor visits, but the comfort of visiting your family physician is a different thing anyway.
To say that I am excited is an understatement! Here’s hoping that the next one month gets filled with loads and loads of happy memories! Madras, here I come!
My daughter had her school Annual Day recently. An English teacher of the school who was the hostess of the evening talked about how kids love to think of themselves as heroes in any stories they might like reading/watching/listening and how, as an English teacher, she often gets to read stories which are the creations of children themselves in which they portray themselves as the heroes. It is then that she pondered about how during our journey from childhood to adulthood, we forget about being our own heroes and start questioning our self-worth in itself at several instances of life. How true!
Children indeed are great teachers and it is up to us adults to pause, take a look at things from their perspective and learn a few life lessons along the way.
Me: Are you going to India for vacation?
X: No.
Me: Will you go during June holidays?
X: No, it will be too hot there. There will be power cuts and my child isn’t used to power cuts!
It is conversations like these that always reminds me how even after moving away from India, my views and wishes have just not changed and how my husband and I continue to let our children remain strongly rooted in our Indian values, culture and lifestyle and want them to be exposed to what others perceive as ‘hardships’ in a developing country like ours. Strangely, these others are people from our very own country. These are the people who have not just lost themselves in the comforts offered by a developed nation and are absolutely enjoying it, but they don’t even want to expose their children to the current status in our country.
I will not deny that I am not enjoying all the comforts from clean drinking water which you can drink straight from the tap to uninterrupted power supply to high-speed uninterrupted Internet (How essential has this become!). Yes, the city is super clean at all times. But, in the larger scheme of life, these just don’t matter. It is the people who surround us who make our life what it is. It doesn’t matter whether there is a power failure or not when you have the strength and support of your family and friends with you and you are in the comfort zone in your own native.
Before you start reminding me that I also don’t stay in my country anymore, yes, I don’t stay there now. Work, career, studies and marriage have brought so many of us away from our country. But, my heart remains deep-rooted in India or, to be precise, in Madras and I, for one, will never really miss these comforts of a developed nation which are still a luxury in our own country, if and when I move back to India for good.