Ok so now back to tracking how my voice rest is going on. Last Saturday saw me waking up with my throat strained. I immediately started doing multiple rounds of gargling, drank lots of warm water and above all, did a quick recap of all that the doctor said. Then I maintained almost complete silence for the next 2 hours. My throat did become better after a while. My daughter, ever the most helpful, from then on, has been reminding me to stop talking the moment I talk beyond a couple of sentences. Barring four-five instances when I talked a lot, but never once shouted, I have otherwise been Ok. My patience level is also improving. I don’t just maintain external silence. I am also working on remaining calm deep down.
Belated Birthday Wishes, My Madras!
Dear Madras,
Yes I did want to wish you on your birthday itself. But you don’t know just how much I miss you these days that I just didn’t want to write yet another post here expressing my longing for you. I read posts all around celebrating you, your culture, heritage and everything that is Madras.
Hey Madras, every time I see a sign board giving details of a heritage place, road or a tree (Yes heritage tree!) in Singapore, I think about how we all have taken your culture and heritage for granted and, forget about taking care of it and promoting it, how much we are neglecting it. Forget about heritage, even your roads are not how they used to be. It is now filled with potholes and bumpy patches in many places. The new Metro and MRTS continue to run with not much patronage. Here’s wishing that you get your infrastructure back in excellent shape and your heritage gets preserved!
Morning Musings
And then there come some moments in your life when you feel so happy and so contented with all that you have. It was just another morning when my kids and I were on the way to the bus stop to go to school. And waiting in the bus stop were lots of friends of my kids. By the time, we reached the school, we were joined by a lot more friends and they were all happily laughing and chatting and walking to school. This sort of a right environment and a good set of friends was what I was craving for all these years during my stay in Singapore. Of course, it is never going to be as happy as being in Madras, but this, at least, is enough for me for now.
The whole day I was feeling so happy and it was on that evening that my daughter came back from school humming, ‘Sare ke sare’ 🙂 It was a beautiful day, indeed!
Sa Re Ke Sa Re Ga Ma Ko Lekar
Returning from school, as we were getting down from the bus, my daughter started singing, ‘Sa Re Ke Sa Re Ga Ma Ko Lekar’ and I immediately joined in ‘Gaate Chale. Papa Nahi Hai’ before my daughter reminded me, ‘You shouldn’t sing!’ Oops but I was so happy hearing this song after a loooong time that I forgot that I shouldn’t sing now. All through that day, my daughter kept humming this song that she had learnt in school just that day.
This beautiful old Hindi film song from the movie ‘Parichay’ is one of my favourite songs. The tune is happy, the video is nice too – all children having loads of fun. Both my kids loved watching it later on YouTube.
Me-Time
Everywhere I find everyone writing about the need for a bit of a me-time to rejuvenate yourself. I wonder if in olden days or even in the previous generation, did people really crave so much for me-time? Forget about everyone else, why do I myself crave for at least a small chunk of 10-minutes of me-time often?
Earlier this year, I went for a concert of Sanjay Subrahmanyan in Singapore. As I was going by train to the venue, I realized that that was the first time I was travelling without my children by train! And to think that I have been here for almost 5 years! Having gotten so much used to people giving up their seats for me since I am with kids all the time, I almost expected that somebody would give me their seat. 😛 That 20-minute train journey had me thinking for quite a while about the need for taking regular breaks from the routine.
A month back, I had taken my kids to Ikea just so they could play in the play area there. This was the first time my son was going to play there. The play area at Ikea doesn’t allow parents inside. Though I knew my daughter would take care of her brother very well, I was still a little bit apprehensive about how he would be. He wanted to come back to me ten minutes before the allotted one hour play time. But those 50 minutes time turned out to be a happy time for my kids and a happy time for me too since I could happily browse through my favourite shop without running behind a naughty toddler. Retail therapy does work wonders, isn’t it? 😉
Believe me when I tell you that your children need a break from you too. Yesterday we had guests come home. My little one was so happily playing with everyone who had come that he didn’t even come near me. Children need more people to play with than too many toys.
When the baby sleeps…
If there is one thing that almost every person who visits you post the birth of your baby tell you, it’s ‘You should take rest and nap when the baby sleeps’. It’s another fact that when you have at least one more person who can take care of the baby, you can rest even when the baby is awake. The problem arises when you are the only one with the baby the whole day and you have a dozen household chores waiting to be done at any given point of time. So every time the baby takes a nap, you would be rushing to do as much as possible and before you are even half way through your chores, the baby would be wide awake feeling refreshed.
Now that my little one is almost two and a half years old and his nowadays-rare daytime naps are always when his sister is back from school, finding a bit of a free time for myself has become a rarity. Today is one of those rare days when my little one is now having his daytime nap and I don’t have much to be done. Ok if I want, I can dust the windows, iron the clothes, etc. But I have decided that all those can wait. Here I am, all set to type away everything that I wanted to in the last two weeks.
In a bid to reduce talking….
Ok so it has been about 12 days since I wrote something here. And how have these 12 days been? The first few days of August were nice and relaxing. But, last week, there were several instances when I was whining aloud a bit, though I did cut it short within a few words. But I definitely did not do it in a loud voice. So, yes, I am improving. But, nowadays, I feel that I am talking a bit more than I should be.
Last week saw both my kids falling sick with fever which meant sleepless nights for the kids and me and crying spells from them. Add to it those rainy days. It meant we couldn’t get our much-needed outdoor play time. So, yes, we were all in a bit of a lousy mood. A school holiday in the middle of the week which turned out to be a rainy day further added to the lousiness. Hmmm, so were these the reasons why I was in a bit of a whining mode myself? No proper sleep meant there was a need to keep at least a bit of a conversation going all through the day (and night too!) with my kids. At two different instances during our nowadays brief-phone-calls, my sister reminded me that my volume level and the tone of my voice needed to be minded.
There were those good moments too with regard to my progress on improving my patience levels and controlling my anger and stress levels. When my daughter had her full-blown crying spell last week, I remained calm throughout, did not raise my voice and did not make the mistake of giving any advice to her. I always get so much stressed out in trying to find ways to calm her down as soon as possible that I would keep talking with her all through the crying spell. It would either be ‘well-meaning advice’ or some more shouting from my side as well! Last week, I not only did not utter any unwanted words, I also remained calm deep-down. My daughter’s crying spells apart, I always get provoked easily. I seem to be improving on that area as well, though I have a long way to go. Unruffled, will I ever be?
Another good thing which has been happening is we have started reaching school on time without rushing on the way. But, there were a few days when I should have reduced my talking further while getting my daughter ready to school.
Anyway, now that both my kids are back to normal and we are all slowly catching up on our lost sleep, I hope that this week turns out to be better. Also, writing here will definitely help me remember to not do any unwanted continuous-talking.
As it rained leaves from the raintree….
On a sunny Sunday afternoon, there I was, sitting on a bench, watching my kids running around in the play area. As a slight breeze started blowing, bringing with it not just a welcome respite from the sweltering heat, but also a ‘rain’ of drying leaves from the raintree near us, my kids and I rejoiced together. The drying leaves in varied shades of yellow to green to brown continued to fall down in colourful bursts for a minute or two. As I lost myself in these dull colours of nature, my kids ran around laughing and catching as many falling tiny leaves as they could.
It is always with a touch of nostalgia that I look at a raintree / thoongumoonji maram. When I was a small kid, my father used to bring back thoongumoonji poo during his morning walks for me to play with. I remember how, back then, I used to watch the leaves of this tree closing down to fall asleep at the onset of evening.
In our apartment in Madras, we had a huge raintree growing more than three floors high. Every time I went to the terrace, I used to watch the beautiful combination made by the pink flowers and green leaves of this tree. Before we put mosquito nets, our balcony used to always have lots of dried leaves of this tree fallen inside. Huge branches of this tree fell during last year’s cyclone and the entire tree had to then be cut off.
Today, I have huge rain trees outside my window and did I tell you that there are always a few dried leaves to be swept away in my living room?
The Friendly Singaporean Elders
Today, as yet another old lady started talking to me non-stop in a friendly tone, I only wished yet again that I put in the time and effort in learning at least a basic conversational Mandarin.
Right from the beginning, we have found the elders here to be extremely friendly. Be it the neighbours or random strangers in the bus/train, corridors and other public places, the elders here have always been very friendly. Saying a ‘Hi!’ or playing with the babies or stopping a crying child with just a ‘Sshh!’ uttered in mock anger or exchanging a sympathetic glance with me as I try to calm a crying child or giving kids candies, they are friendly all the time. Be it listening with rapt attention to the Chinese songs our daughter was learning in school or just striking a conversation with us. But language has always been a big barrier when it came to communicating with them since most of them do not know English. In our previous apartment, we had such a helpful neighbour, but, alas, language was the problem. We had to wait till her son came home to communicate anything important. If only I learn Chinese…
Did I say I wouldn’t rush?!
So I sit and, at first, slowly and then in a lightning speed type my previous post on Kelantan Road, all the while looking at the clock. Then, once I finish, I take a final glance at the clock – 2:43 pm. On normal days, I would have started rushing since I know I have only two minutes left to leave for school to pick up my daughter. But, today, I decide not to rush, especially, right after writing here that I will work on not rushing.
So I don’t rush and still reach the school on time. Here’s to further reducing my rushing and, more importantly, controlling my tongue even if I am rushing!